Love and Connection, relationships, Soul, Spirituality

Have You Encountered Someone from A Past Life?

Some connections never die.



“Important encounters are planned by the souls long before the bodies see each other.”

— Paulo Coelho

The idea of having lived before can be difficult to wrap your head around. As humans, we’re so ingrained in the here and now; caught up in our current life drama. That’s completely normal. It’s easy to believe that this present physical life is the only reality. It’s not as if we have tangible evidence to prove that we once walked the earth in a different skin in another lifetime, any more than we have concrete memories of knowing someone before actually meeting them. All we’ve got are peculiar feelings, Déjà vu-like memories and an uncanny sense of familiarity.

Reincarnation, also known as metempsychosis, transmigration, resurrection or life after death, is most characteristic of Eastern philosophy, New Age and religious beliefs that centers around the rebirthing of our non-physical essence (or soul) beginning a new life in a different physical body after death.

No doubt you’ve heard of this phenomenon as a past life, where your soul is born into another person after you expire from …. erm…. this life.

I know, the thought of being the same but not can be a bit mind-boggling and maybe even a little far-fetched. As if body-hopping is only reserved for evil serial killer entities in supernatural horror films. Except, there are many scientific experts out there with thousands of case studies behind them who believe that reincarnation is, in fact, genuine.

For instance, the late Dr Ian Stevenson dedicated much of his career to finding evidence of reincarnation. And while there can be never be irrefutable proof that reincarnation is a real thing, his work has supplied evidence suggesting in its reality.

Thinking about the soul and past lives always brings me back to Dr. Wayne Dyer and his book, Wishes Fulfilled, where he quoted an ancient spiritual avatar about the ‘real’.

“What is real?” Guru was asked.

“What is real is that which never changes,” he replied.

More from the book:

“When looking for what is real and unchanging about ourselves, we can apply this definition. There is an unchanging spark from the Creator in each of us, our highest self, a piece of God. And we are all connected.”

The way I see it is that your soul is the unchanging spark which remains the same after your present body has exhausted itself. This can definitely account for the fact that we are not just limited to one body and one life experience.

Perhaps, body-hopping isn’t just something that happens in movies after all.


Have you ever encountered someone for the first time, yet instantly felt as if you’ve known them before?

I have. It’s the strangest and most incredible feeling.

A few years back, I met someone who instantly struck a mystifying sense of familiarity in me. The feeling was so powerful that it overtook my entire being to the point that even though I tried to brush it aside, it was impossible to ignore.

Eventually, I began to accept that this was something different than I’d ever known with anyone else. I just intuitively knew that there was a soul history between us and became aware that it wasn’t in the scope of my intellectual understanding. I realized that I was deeply connected to this person, even though I had no explanation as to why I felt that way.

You’re curious. You may have met someone who feels oddly familiar without reason, and who ignites a powerful sensation that can uplift your heart as much as kill you on the inside.

Have you encountered someone from a past life? Here’s a few signs that might help you determine if it’s the real deal:

Obscure Memories

Meeting someone who activates deep soul recognition from a past life is an intense and unique experience that cannot be mistaken for anything other than an eternal bond.

You don’t consciously know it or think, “Hey, I know you from a past life”, but you do understand it at some level — the unchanging spark within you knows sacred secrets from bygone eras. You just know that your soul and theirs have shared time before.

You have no idea how or why, but you begin to remember unclear moments that manifest as random visions, flashbacks, dreams and feelings not experienced in this lifetime with this person.

You may even begin to question your sanity at times.

Internal Sensations

  • You feel an immediate “out of this world “connection with this person.
  • You experience a strange knowing that he or she was always in your life, even before they arrived.
  • The encounter and interactions conjure up an unexplainable well of deep emotions within you.
  • Confusion is your new friend as your mind struggles to catch up with your heart and soul knowledge.
  • You light up and synchronize with them right away.

The Sound of Their Voice Affects You

Hearing the voice of a past life mate is much like coming home. Their tone seems to vibrate at a frequency that was always meant to resonate with your energetic essence. As if it was some pre-determined signal organized between your souls before incarnation so that you may recognize each other.

Their sound is comforting; arousing nostalgic sensations and the deeply sentimental, and their laughter may hanker on your heart like a wistful yesteryear.

Internal Sensations

  • You feel lost and found all at the same time.
  • You sense a shift within, revealing parts of yourself you didn’t know existed.
  • All your existing plans become irrelevant as he or she totally redesigns your life.
  • You slowly understand that you will never look at life the same way.
  • You feel as if you could listen to them forever.
  • Their voice activates and unlocks your heart to create a higher meaning of love within.

They Feel Like Unfinished Business

“Connection doesn’t care about the laws of the land; your soul will be pulled to the place it belongs.”

— Unknown

Just as the sound of their voice brings you undone, so does the sense of unending “soul” business with this person. As if they have appeared in your life to challenge you in some way.

Famous psychic, Michelle Knight teaches us about past life encounters:

The souls with whom we have the deepest connection and with whom we have chosen to learn and grow with, are the ones who are there to teach us the most profound lessons. And sometimes these lessons are not easy. Just because you have known one another in a past life does not mean it will all be love and happy endings in this one.”

These challenges can manifest as either positive or negative, and the bigger the contradictions and/or obstacles, the more you will have to grow on a soul level in order to meet and understand the higher meaning.

This characteristic is one of the greatest signs that you’ve met a profound soul connection from a past life here, because this person will push you to seek new meaning and discover personal uncharted territory just by showing up in your life.

They will force you to do the inner-work.

Internal Sensations

  • The mere presence of this person demands truth and honesty at a deeply authentic level like you’ve never before experienced.
  • You experience a slight pulse that begins in your soul and grows intense when confronting deep truths and facing your demons.
  • They excite, repel and delight you as you are propelled into intense introspection, self-actualization and startling moments of clarity.
  • You feel your soul expanding and evolving as new revelations pour forth.
  • Your mind and heart blows wide open to the possibilities.
  • You begin to see everything differently.
  • You begin to distinguish between real and illusionary realities.
  • You can see right through them and them through you.
  • You discover in yourself a strength that you never knew existed.
  • They have a knack for making you feel unimportant and important simultaneously — they can break or lift you like no other.
  • You sense what they represent to you at an intricate level.
  • You know that the connection is much more than yourself and this lifetime, and realize that they are a part of you and it will always be so.

Feeling of belonging

You feel as if you’ve gazed into their eyes a thousand times before. What you see reflecting back at you is a great sense of belonging — your mirror in another person through to your soul.

As well, time and space mean nothing and your connection remains strong even when you’re apart.

The feeling of belonging is in their eyes that ignite an inner-journey toward your whole self, and the perfectly orchestrated path that led you to the exact moment of correspondence.

Belonging is in the dreams and constant confirming signs, and the way you know each other’s thoughts and emotions without having to speak it out loud. It’s in the ease in which the relationship evolves through your soul.

Internal Sensations

  • You feel like a different person around them.
  • You might feel as if your very survival depends on this person remaining in your life in a certain way.
  • You begin to merge with your subconscious-self, which does not differentiate between past, present and future.
  • Your sense of time surrounding this person becomes irrelevant.
  • You feel an intimate connection with them, even if you do not spend time together.
  • You feel an intense longing to be close to them.
  • You may feel that earth is not your true home.
  • You yearn to go home.
  • You have a great affinity for this person that continues to grow over time.
  • You now have a profound sense of wisdom and an unusual capacity to see the deeper meaning in life’s events.

If you’ve experienced these feelings and sensations before, then you have likely encountered someone from a past life who you have run into once again on your current journey.

Trust your intuition and be mindful of how you feel. And always remember that meeting someone of this soul-significance is a gift that should always be treated with the highest respect and honor.


Originally published by Living Out Loud on Medium

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Creative Writing Energy Podcast, Creativity, Soul, writing

The Creative Secrets of Shamanic Drumming

You’ve got to feel the beat.


“It is of the first order of importance to remember this, that the shaman is more than merely a sick man, or a madman; he is a sick man who has healed himself, who is cured, and who must shamanize in order to remain cured.”
― Terence McKenna

Shamanic drumming is a purposeful soul journey usually undertaken in the company of like-minded people. The experience is intimate and personal, yet it is also qualified by an undeniable element of unification — deliberate togetherness.

Before social distancing kicked in with COVID-19, I was regularly attending drumming circles and learning from my very cool Shaman teachers, Bastian and Tiger.

Each session offered an insightful and unique experience in a profoundly personal way. There is just something about letting yourself go with the beat of a drum, and then connecting your energy with the vibration as it reaches in your heart-space, uplifting and energizing your being in such a critical way that it becomes a part of you.

It’s like smudging for the soul.

After each session, I always left the studio with a renewed sense of creative flow — it’s as if those sacred experiences existed to further open my awareness into my sense of self, which spilled over into my creativity, helping to keep those vital bonds between imagination and reality ignited.

Shamanic Drumming

From Shamanic Drumming:

“Shamanic drumming is drumming for the purpose of inducing a range of ecstatic trance states in order to connect with the spiritual dimension of reality. Practiced in diverse cultures around the planet, this drum method is strikingly similar the world over.”

Shamanic drumming uses a repetitive rhythm that begins slowly and then gradually builds in intensity to a tempo of three to seven beats per second.

Admittedly, it usually takes me a little bit to shake off the ‘real world’ feels and relax into the changed, esoteric-like atmosphere. Though, once we begin, it feels as if I have crossed an invisible threshold into a different realm — one that I am always reluctant to leave behind.

You have to intentionally let go of any inhibitions that may prevent you from benefiting from the spiritual medicine offered by the drumming session if you really want to gain insights from the journey.

More from Shamanic Drumming:

“The ascending tempo will induce light to deep trance states, and facilitate the shamanic techniques of journeying, shapeshifting, and divination. Practitioners may progress through a series of trance states until they reach the level that is necessary for healing to occur.”

What is Shamanism?

Shamanism is universal and not bound by social or cultural conditions. It is the most ancient and most enduring spiritual tradition known to humanity. Shamanism predates and constitutes the foundation of all known religions or religious philosophies.

In essence, shamanism is the spiritual practice of ecstasy. Ecstasy is defined as a mystic, prophetic, or poetic trance. One of the core beliefs of shamanism is that innate wisdom and guidance can be accessed through the inner senses in ecstatic trance. Practitioners enter altered states of consciousness in order to experience direct revelation from within.

Shamanism is about remembering, exploring, and developing the true self. Shamanism places emphasis on the individual, of breaking free and discovering your own uniqueness in order to bring something new back to the group.

Shamanic practice heightens the ability of perception and enables you to see into the deeper realms of the self. Once connected with your inner self you can find help, healing, and a continual source of guidance. To practice shamanism is to reconnect with your deepest core values and your highest vision of who you are and why you are here.”

How it Works

Shamanic Drumming circles come together all over the world with the sole purpose of healing the human spirit as a collective. I think that now, more than ever, the world can use those who have the ability to see beyond the chaos and pain enough to uphold the positive transformations which are bound to take place when the dust settles — that which will rise from the ashes of this prophetic era.

And make no mistake, Shaman teachers and students alike; and those in touch with their spirituality work quietly and tirelessly to help keep the vision and vibrations positive for the future. Regardless of your beliefs, collective consciousness and mindset plays a vital part in the unfolding future — and is there a better way to release the negative tension than pounding hard on something?

A nice thick layer of animal hide?

With thanks and gratitude.

Susan Z from 7th Sense Stories knows about Shamanic drumming and explains how the process works:

“How it works is the healing drum pattern projects onto the body a supportive resonance or sound pattern the body can attune to. This sympathetic resonance forms new harmonic alignments, opens the body’s various energy meridians and chakras, releases blocked emotional patterns, promotes healing and helps reconnect us to our core. The sound patterns also enhance your sense of empowerment and stimulates your creative expression.”

The journey aspect of a Shamanic Drumming circle involves a guided odyssey into another realm; a rumination to the soulful beat of the drums accompanied by other beautiful sounds, the burning scent of incense, essential oils and a dedicated altar.

The practice essentially leads us into an induced trance where boundaries cease to exist and clarity comes calling, as we give and receive from earth energies. It is here that completes the modest, yet significant finale of the entire journey — where secrets abound and creativity unfurls through group Shamanic Meditation.

Healing

The healing power of drums, is, in my opinion, phenomenal.

The drumming has a way of grounding and reacquainting you to your primordial beginnings — when the deep resonating beats strum through your being, you get a glimpse of yourself as a part of the greater whole.

It is a most humbling experience which soothes and heals from the inside out, and also helps to activate your own natural healing powers.

The Powerful Benefits of Shamanic Drumming Healing Include:

  • Reduces stress.
  • Enhances creativity.
  • Improves your concentration.
  • Encourages the body to desire a healthier lifestyle.
  • Makes you feel happier.
  • Opens up acceptance of self.
  • Slows the aging process.
  • It is beneficial to your cardiovascular health.
  • Boosts your overall immune system.
  • Induces a deeper self-awareness by prompting synchronous brain activity and promoting alpha waves.
  • Helps to release negative feelings and emotional trauma.

Shamanic Drumming really does help to connect you with your creative resources as the process cleanses and purifies lower vibrational feelings that may have been dwelling deep within. It’s like shedding the BS and releasing the ego long enough to sense who you really are beneath the crud we so often present to the world.

And what lies beneath is where the magic really begins.


Originally published by Living Out Loud on Medium

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life, relationships, Soul

The One Quality About Michael Hutchence that Magnetized the World

“You know sometimes I just want to curl up on stage and lie there for a while — it’s weird.” — Michael Hutchence


Calling All Nations

Sydney: November 12th, 1988, and I could barely keep myself in check while riding the Illawarra line with some good friends, crooning INXS classics like Need You Tonight and Burn for You. Spirits were high. The air was charged with magic energy. I was en route to spending my first evening with the man Billy Zane described as “the frontman for a nation” — Michael Hutchence and his rocking soulful band INXS.

A friend named Paris organized the tickets and was almost as exotic as the man himself for various reasons:

I. He was older than me and looked like Benicio del Toro in his heyday.

II. He was strangely well-connected for an 18-year-old.

III. I had personally never known any guy before or since named after the European City of Lights.

Bonjour sensualité!

Paris knew someone who knew someone who …. err …. knew another someone who could score us some prime seats for the event held at the Sydney Entertainment Centre. After a Kick-ass world tour, INXS was coming home to celebrate their worldwide success complete with a well-deserved side of glorious top-dog swagger.

I wasn’t missing that experience for all the money in China.

Now, Paris delivered on his promise in producing choice seats for the show. I was there, ready to experience my first taste of in-person Hutchence gold, and barely able to wait out the time for the supporting band to wrap it up. But when the homegrown Sydney boys eventually gave it up to the tune of What You Need, oddly enough, I gave it up too.

No, I didn’t rip off my dainty black bra and toss it on stage. Nor did I flash my breasts at the utterly delish. Truth. I’m not that extreme. Besides, by no means were those guys shy of nipples, lips, hips and flesh at that particular moment in life.

Lining the hotel halls 24/7 like junk-lump wallpaper in cities all over the world.

Speaking of 24/7, you know those old black and white clips of crazy fan-girls screaming and crying like idiots after famous artists like The Beatles or Elvis Presley?

Say no more.

(Except that it was the first and only time that ever happened.)

Of course, I blame Michael Hutchence (and maybe teenage hormones) for the unexpected emotional outburst. There was just so much pent-up energy within that by the time the cool-cat rocker strutted onto the stage, the floodgates deemed too much to control.

What? The man was as sexy as sin, boasted an unmistakable voice and a stunningly unique presence — there was no question that his irreplaceable talent could make a girl weak at the knees, among other things….

But Michael was more than just an attractive rock star with an impressive head of hair who sang like honey, collected “famous” friends and swooned women everywhere — there was something special about him that made him stand out among his peers — the one quality unique to him that magnetized the world.

Michael Jackson had a chimp called Bubbles. Mick Jagger had those famous “rubber” lips and a bad boy image, and Angus Young had his disturbing version of a schoolboy uniform. Aside from possessing a super sensual hip-grind, Michael Hutchence had a unique vulnerability about him.

A trait which proved to be the special sauce that was the foundation for his ability to take in all of life and exude a rare authentic presence while living in the fast-lane.


I’m Just a Man

“I know who I am and what I do.” — Michael Hutchence


Those who kept a keen eye on Michael Hutchence know that his nature was very introverted, shy and sensitive. Not only were those qualities well-documented by the people who were close to him, but it was those characteristics that influenced and presented through his body of creative work.

In Richard Lowenstein’s documentary, The Last (True) Rock Star, Tina Hutchence recounts the first time she saw her brother Michael perform: “We went into this dingy place … there was lots of beer flowing… I was kind of worried because it looked like a tough crowd out there and Michael is kind of quiet. I didn’t know what was going to happen and I was kind of concerned. He came on and there was this metamorphosis. My quiet spoken brother became this person on stage that just blew me away.”

So. Awesome.

American professor Brené Brown, who is well-known for teaching us the value in vulnerability and the personal benefits we gain from choosing to explore our emotions rather than bottling them up, says that the path to self-awareness and true connection is through our willingness to get vulnerable with the people who are important to us.

Brown:

“Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and the path to the feeling of worthiness. If it doesn’t feel vulnerable, the sharing is probably not constructive.”

Hutchence was clearly in touch with himself and his masculinity enough to be true to who he was. He was a free-spirit who didn’t lack the courage to express, explore and open himself to his vulnerability — the creation of connectedness that rippled from the inside out and into his music to unite nations.

Bono, who is the frontman of the legendary rock band, U2, was said to be impressed with his friend’s (Michael Hutchence) take on music: “I remember asking Michael what his definition of rock & roll was — he said, ‘Liberation.’”

Liberation on a personal level is self-exploration to achieve freedom from self-limiting thoughts. It is daring to realize your pure spirit and understanding freedom in its truest form, and that requires a certain dose of vulnerability.

Freedom is knowing who you are and believing in that person enough to then liberate and uplift others through the important work you offer the world. Freedom is in your essence.

Michael’s father, Kelland Hutchence: “Michael was a shy, lovely kid…. He was warm, tender. A gentle boy who loved writing poetry.”

I believe Michael’s vulnerability radiated like a rare star brighter than any rock. His presence was a sensually creative interpretation of quiet yet open, intelligently fun…. a grounded futurist — he managed to strike a balance with his Rock God alter-ego, enjoying the perks and trappings of superstardom while still possessing an understanding of life and humanity.

Essentially, it was Michael’s vulnerability that we fans’ picked up and homed in on; it made him feel reachable, relatable and connected; and that’s the overarching quality that contributed to his uniqueness and made Michael Hutchence so damn special.


Questions

“He was something like tomorrow.” — Billy Zane

But with all of his reserved and introspective qualities, Michael had to find a way to cope with the attention of being a rock star — he had to compartmentalize himself to manage fame.

Michael said: “I get pretty terrified, to be honest, when I’m on tour. You really have to muster a lot of ego to go out there, which I find draining.”

So how did the rock star deal with it?

He had to insulate his gentler characteristics to protect himself. Kory Grow from Rolling Stone Magazine:

“When the band’s Kick album became a sextuple-platinum megahit, Hutchence had to get over his innate shyness quickly and figure out a way to navigate all the attention — “From the fantasy to the reality of, ‘Oh, this is actually happening,’ that would be really tricky because I wasn’t that comfortable with it,” Hutchence says of fame. “So, I sort of invented that [big] persona with the necessity of getting through it. I enjoyed it but I had to create something that kept me inside as well.”

Michael may have wavered from time to time. We know that he struggled with his inner-demons and like the rest of us, made his fair share of mistakes along the way. But through it all, he never truly lost sight of who he was, where he was going and his deepest truths; and he cared enough to cherish that part of himself.

Honestly, having an insight like that is like knowing a secret. It’s an intangible quality in a person’s soul that you can just sense.

Some years later, I sensed it in Michael the night that I met him (minus the hormone-induced emotional eruption). It was drizzling wet and late, and I was waiting for him at the backstage door after a concert. Michael had a broken leg (from falling off the stage at another gig) and he was accompanied by a throng of hangers-on, some of them quite beautiful.

I said nothing to call on his attention. He could have easily dismissed me and climbed into the waiting car but he didn’t. Instead, he flashed a grin before hobbling down the stairs on his crutches over to where I was standing, stopping next to me to give me his time.

Time is a gift we lend of ourselves to others.

Shine Like it Does

So, what’s the biggest takeaway that we can learn from a guy like Michael Hutchence?

This was a rock star who didn’t think it beneath him to find the time to talk and laugh on the phone with a gushing Sydney teenage girl one Saturday morning sometime during the late 80’s.

Michael’s ability to stay real, spirited and humble through mighty fame and fortune is the one thing I always admired the most about him.

I don’t know about you, but of all the qualities for a person to possess and demonstrate in this life, I believe that keeping our spirit humble has to be among the most important.

That’s where lies the key to real success and fueled the underlying qualities shining below the surface of Michael’s vulnerability — the story since time began.

Michael had success nailed long before fame found him; and it was in him all along — the magic of vulnerability.



Originally published by Living Out Loud on Medium

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life, Love and Connection, Soul

Do You Want to Know What Love Really Is?

Love is Magic


“Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames.” ~ Rumi.

Love is Magic

I mean, why do you think generations of philosophers, poets and writers alike have favored the heart-pulsing topic since way back when? It is because love is the most powerful emotion that we experience in our humanity.

Love changes us. No other emotion comes close to possessing the ability to filter through our boundaries and alter our perspective like love. No other feeling can crash into our hearts and explode into our awareness with such fever, passion, feeling and sentiment.

Love is creation and connection in all its magical glory.

Like ecstasy for the soul; syrup for the heart. It uplifts spirits, elevates us into higher states of awareness and colors our world with beauty, humility and exquisite rapture.

It is more than a feeling; it is a way of being in the world — love is an experience.

Love Is What You Say

If our time and attention are our most valuable things in the world, then it is our experiences that make for the special sauce — the unforgettable moments that give meaning to our lives.

Essentially, we are a collection of our experiences. Right? And the way we choose or not choose to be with love is all we are going to take from our life when it’s over.

Not the money or prestige; our reputation or the high-end connections we seek to benefit from. Not the hate or spite that just inspired you to send a threatening email to someone you barely know. Not even your religion.

Truth is, your life experiences will reflect the degree of love you bring to the world — how you see it is what you’ll get back.

On November 11th of 2017, I missed my flight home to Sydney from LAX due to an emergency that occurred on the connecting flight from Louisiana.

It was late and I was stressed. Honestly, I kind of had an inner-mini-meltdown, and for the record, the people handling the entire situation were behaving like unhelpful … umm … morons.

Frazzled, tired and verging on tears, I finally got to the hotel where the airline put me up for the night. I was waiting my turn to check-in when a man approached, extending a bouquet of white roses.

He wasn’t hitting on me, nor was he being sleazy. He was the father-of-the-bride of the wedding reception that happened to be winding down for the evening.

You know that deepest part of yourself that connects you to the stars and beyond? Your inner-voice that guides you towards kinder feelings and brighter outlooks, or shows you signs that something higher is looking out for you?

That’s the love inside of you.

Sometimes, it shows up in the unexpected acts of love from a complete stranger.

At first, I refused the flowers, telling him that they were too beautiful and I couldn’t possibly accept them.

He insisted.

Connecting to the love inside is like fusing with the sacramental essence which is the universe within you. Honoring your love-space and opening your heart is coalescing with all of the life-force energy and thereby, creating greater spheres of love into your experiences.

I looked at him and something clicked; as if his eyes silently spoke to my soul without me realizing it at the time. I felt the tension slightly ease.

Love is energy-enmeshment that goes way beyond our physicality. It is a complex mix of emotions and behaviors combined with strong feelings of affection, protectiveness, warmth, and respect for someone else.

Love is also acceptance.

When I reached to take the flowers from him, my fingers shook and it took all I had not to break with the gratitude erupting. I thanked him and checked in, grabbed my luggage and glanced around the lobby for him before heading to my room. He was gone.

Love isn’t control. It’s not ownership, a marriage contract or entrapment. It’s not the smirk you just gave or the snidey laugh at someone else’s expense. It isn’t manipulation, vindictiveness or how another person judges you.

Love is never a crime.

I don’t recall the detailed appearance of the man who gave me roses in an L.A hotel lobby late one night, and he will never know how that one small gesture will remain with me long after I die — it was one of the greatest acts of love I have ever known.

Those white roses represented the truest meaning of love in that their presence in my room symbolized charity, spirit, humanity, empathy, faith and belief. And they arrived directly from a union of love at the exact moment in time that I needed it.

Love is faith and finding the courage in yourself to trust in the higher-good. It’s a selfless gesture; compassionate words and a meeting of souls. It’s forgiveness, tolerance and empathy; the eyes in every beast reflecting back the stars, the moon and the air filling your being.

Love is allowing people to affect and transform you. And it’s rejecting all that opposes it.

November 11, 2017 is a date that will always remind me of love-in-action. Love really is magic.


Originally published by P.S. I Love you on Medium



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life, Love and Connection, relationships, Soul, Whispers

The Spiritual Secrets of *Soul* Love

Express your true, soulful self


“The minute I heard my first love story I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.”

— Rumi

It isn’t even that some of us have an uncanny niggling that time is neither our friend nor foe. Or that somewhere, in an untapped part of our soul lies obscure memories imprinted from another lifetime of ancient civilizations like the Amorite dynasties of Babylon, circa 1894 BC; or the Aegean Neolithic farmers of the Bronze Age. Purpose will always outweigh time and your soul will always possess an eternally mysterious past. Can you imagine what secrets your soul knows about love — soul love?

All of us have a soul history.

Dr Michael Newton, who developed his own hypnosis technique to reach his subjects’ hidden memories of the hereafter, famously mapped out our soul’s evolution. Newton’s body of work “reveals graphic details about how it feels to die, who meets us right after death, what the spirit world is really like, where we go and what we do as souls, and why we choose to come back in certain bodies”.

Basically, Newton’s research has found that our soul evolves through the experiences and lessons gathered over and in-between lifetimes. Some of our most vital and profound soul lessons come in the form of the relationships encountered along the way — how we treat others, the degree in which we love and the choices we make around love.

Extremely interesting subject to ponder, right? But enough about the ins and outs of spiritual evolution. You are here now. Today. In a time when learning how to unravel the mystery of love is probably more crucial than ever before. None so much as soul love.

What is Soul Love?

Simply put, soul love is the deep and pure love that arises from your unique essence. Love touches our lives in many forms and there all types of love. Soul love is primarily an energetic or spiritual based love.

Soul Solutions for life describes the concept of soul love best:

“Soul love is pure love. It is constant and unconditional. It is the natural state of your being. Soul love is a power to be remembered and embodied once again. It uplifts and elevates all that it touches. It transforms and heals. It is truly magic.”

Soul Love has Secrets like Serendipity

Vocabulary.com Dictionary defines Serendipity as: “Good luck in making unexpected and fortunate discoveries”. That’s one of the characteristics of soul love — discovering something priceless unintentionally.

Remember when Jonathan first encountered Sara at Bloomingdale’s when they went to buy the same pair of cashmere gloves in the 2001 film, Serendipity?

I do.

It was clear that neither Jonathon or Sara expected anything more than an ordinary Christmas shopping trip that evening. Just as apparent was the undeniable connection and strong attraction between them. It was immediate and powerful; like a deepening sensation so strong that even though both of them were involved with other people, they still chose to share dessert at a restaurant called Serendipity before parting ways.

Soul love is an intimate recognition beyond what our eyes perceive.

Whether or not Jonathon and Sara intellectually understood the historically spiritual nature of their bond, both of them sensed its great value. It was the unique dynamic offered by the ignition of deep soul love that neither of them could forget and eventually orchestrated their union years later.

Soul love in-action is:

Real Love

“For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.” — Judy Garland

Giving is the nature of this relationship.

Meeting someone and falling in love soul-to-soul is especially tender because more often than not, there is usually a long soul history between the two of you — your encounter could very well be a continuation of “starting energy” from a previous experience in another incarnation.

Maybe you scrawled on clay tablets together by the Aegean Sea in another lifetime. Perhaps you lived, loved and lost elsewhere. What matters now is unraveling the mystery of souls and allowing the knowledge to sink into your being and your life, and to affect you as the connection matures through the ages.

Soul love is the expression of true self.

It is making the choice to love to a different vibration, and to experience love in its purest form. Soul love is born from freedom and radiates things like tolerance, empathy, open communication and forgiveness.

In true soul love, you will feel appreciated, cherished and respected; and most of all, no judgment is applied to make you feel less than.

Spiritual love is not only a gift to you and your soul lover, but also to humanity because it helps to raise the love-vibration on the planet. As such, it should be honored and taken very seriously.

Humility & Equality

Humility and equality are strong characteristics of soul love, and soul love thrives on accepting and embracing your differences.

Honestly, many people find it challenging to fully understand the definition of equality in a relationship — this kind of love has no difficulty recognizing who is better at handling certain aspects of your lives together, or applying the trust without prejudice.

From PsychCentral:

“Some people confuse humility with weakness. But the opposite is true. It takes inner strength to acknowledge that we don’t have all the answers, to refrain from injecting our point of view into a conversation before really hearing what the other person has to say.”

Humility in soul love is…

  • Letting go of your ego to deepen communication within the relationship.
  • Acknowledging and accepting both your shortcomings and strengths.
  • Making space for the other person to express themselves freely.
  • Thoughtfulness.
  • Setting aside the urge to judge and accepting differing opinions.
  • The skills to admit your mistakes and expressing a sincere apology when required.

Reaching a space where you are able to acknowledge your mate’s talents and respect each other enough to allow you to both work your unique magic into your relationship is among the core principles of humility and equality in any connection:

Wisdom, love and generosity.

Spiritual Growth & Constant Truth

Soul love is dedicated to the spiritual in everything.

Total unconditional and complete love and acceptance. There is a special sacredness about your relationship that transcends anything you have ever experienced before. In essence, a part of you already knows — you will feel it with your whole being, right to the tips of your toes.

No other relationship will be as life changing or fuel your life with renewed purpose, creative energy and insight; and no other connection will ignite your personal and spiritual growth like soul love.The feelings you have for them cannot always be put into words, and yet, there is a deeply internal sense that the purpose of your relationship is to bring something extraordinary to the world for the betterment of the planet.

In terms of truths, you can always expect your soul love partner to tell you like it is (their viewpoint). Though, a constant need to be in truth together provides an authentic, rare and honest foundation to the connection.

Truthfully speaking, this soul love characteristic can be somewhat challenging and uncomfortable at times, and that’s completely normal — but at least you always know where you are together, and that’s completely vital.

Dedicated Lovers

In every way, soul love isn’t separated from the spiritual.

Older souls who have known previous lives together hold one another in understanding of the spiritual nature of their connection. The spiritual energy is the strongest of their bonds and very present in their combined sexual connection.

A pairing of soul love makes for a most exquisite dance in attentiveness and intense sexual attraction for each other. It is the underlying intent qualifying the smallest of gestures that intimately communicates their desire and passion to be together.

Soul love is a romantic relationship filled with endless metaphysical interaction.

The encounter and union awakens the kundalini energy in each other which will surely blaze as bright as a fiery sunset at dusk. That sacred place within bounding you by the heart and entwining your souls to a greater energy source. When this energy is consciously combined, it becomes an earth-shattering force to be reckoned with.

Acts of soul love are never just for the physical senses, as the longing between souls represents a desire that they can’t ever get close enough to one another.

This is as frustrating as it is beautiful.

Soul love might sound a bit abstract and esoteric to some. But I believe that we are not always meant to understand everything about ourselves and the world on an intellectual level. And that some of our most significant lessons must be experienced spiritually in order to truly make sense of life.

That’s soul love.

We can fall in love with our souls, and we can choose to honor and love from that sacred space within. You’ve just got to be willing to realize the truth of what has been and find the love that resides deep inside — amazing soul love.


Originally published on 11.10.2020 by P.S. I Love You on Medium

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Love and Connection, relationships, Romance, sexuality, Soul, Women

The Art of Making Love to a Woman


“Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.”

– Aristotle


One of the greatest aspects of being in love has to be the connectedness and intimacy involved in the act of making love. Think about it — Sex is energy. So, when we qualify sex with love, we tap into pure life-force energy that directly connects us to something greater than ourselves. It is true.If can we approach the act with the intention to experience love authentically, it’s like treating our sex-lives to a big injection of heavenly rocket-fuel. Making love is unification of the highest order. But the real art of making love is lost on so many of us.

Meaningful. Expressive. Persuasive. Awakening.

No other act is as powerfully symbolic as lovemaking as the unfolding of a life of two people being presently conscious to become one — not only in co-mingling of body, but in spirit and soul. As Elliot D. Cohen puts it: “Making love is inspirational because it signifies and embodies two mutually living as one.”

Making love is more than just great sex. It would be a mistake think otherwise. I spent more years than I care to remember believing that I knew what making love was all about when in reality, the opposite was true.

That’s not to say that sexual desire and intimacy wasn’t present in my relationships — it most definitely was. But the sexual encounters never felt overly meaningful. I couldn’t actually gage the depth of my partner’s feelings for me between the sheets because although affectionate and loving, the sex was based purely on satisfying our sexual desires. Making love is so much more.

What’s the difference, then?

Well, a lot actually.

Love-making is distinct from mere sex as it breaches the flume between you and me in an act of mutual consciousness of absolute unity without segregation.

Sounds like an intense riddle. Just a bit.

Let’s unravel.

Desire for sexual pleasure is one of the most powerful feelings known to us. It’s innate, beautiful, raw and sometimes primitive, and the very act responsible for why you are able to read these words in this moment.

No, really.

Happy birthday.

However, the distinction between “making love” and “having sex” is in the nature of intended fulfillment.

In other words, sexual love is more about quenching one’s sexual appetite, whereas making love is based on meaningful, conscious and emotional connection.

“Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.”

– Woody Allen

The following according to philosopher Alan Goldman:

“Sexual desire is a mechanical activity. Rubbing, touching, caressing, kissing, sucking, biting, and, of course, intercourse, as fulfillments of a desire for physical contact, are all sexual activities in this sense.”

Okay, having “normal” sex is not such a bad thing. Hot nights of lusty wild sex with your partner can be fun and satisfying. But a woman loves it when a man knows how make love to her. And that is because there’s a lot more care, connection and emotion involved than just taking off your clothes and going at it.

Mind you, it doesn’t mean that every time you have sex with someone you love it has to be categorized as making love. In fact, as beautiful as it is, this type of loving should be saved for when the time feels right because it is such an intimate act.

So, how about that opening quote from Aristotle?

It is said that the Greek philosopher wrote the quote based on mythology written about his mentor, Plato.

From Philosiblog:

“The story goes that humans were originally made with four arms, four legs and were half male and half female. After conspiring to climb Mount Olympus, Zeus ordered them cut in half. Since that day, every human spends their life searching for their other half.”

I know, that little tale sounds rather far-fetched and perhaps a tad on the Sci-Fi side, but mythology often has a way of carrying an inexplicable resonance through the ages. In this case, Aristotle was hitting on the crucial meeting of souls — the deep sense of “wholeness” or “home” when encountering someone with whom feels like a part of you.

Through love-making, a couple’s past, present, and future — hopes, dreams, and expectations coalesce as one, and not two persons. A total fusion of body and soul where love transcends space, time and physicality as they surrender to separateness to inclusion of the other.

Lovers in every sense of the word.

Forget banging, getting laid, getting it on, and all of those different ways to have sex. More than any of that, a woman often wants to make love to the man she loves. And really, can you blame her?

Having said all of that, a man must be able to not only successfully lead the act, but be a conscious participant in the unfolding of love with his woman.

The Art of Making Love to a Woman is:

Taking Your Sweet Time

With everything.

Making love doesn’t just begin in the bedroom. It is a hot and interesting mind-play with promises of the love to come. Think of it like a sensual slow dance consisting of flirty comments, lingering looks and a spicy text message or two.

I love it when my partner unexpectedly pings me with a provocative message through the day, or approaches me from behind in the morning and huskily murmurs in my ear when I’m busy getting the kids ready for school. It let’s me know what’s on his mind and makes me feel sexy — which is exactly how you want a woman to feel when planning a lovemaking session.

This is the intentional art of “layering” foreplay which speaks to a woman’s emotional side and definitely primes her mood for sex.

Ensuring that you are Kissable

This is important. Nothing will pull a woman out of a love-trance quicker than stinky balls and a smelly butt. Sorry, have to go here for a moment…

Please tend to your personal hygiene before you touch your woman. This means taking a shower and lathering up with soap or body wash, paying extra attention to your below-bits.

Making love involves a lot of lip and tongue action, and I am quite certain you would like your woman to put her mouth down south, yes?

No brainer.

Sidenote: Clipped and smooth nails are ideal for obvious reasons, and a trimmed manscape is muchly appreciated, too.

Getting the Mood Right

I prefer muted lighting when getting sexy. Thankfully, my fella knows how to set the mood to dim and sultry:

Candles create a sexy atmosphere and are easy on the senses which means all senses can focus on the important stuff like … hmm 

Erotic love and deep romance.

Music should be on the sensual side and not too loud. The right tunes will help keep you attuned with the scene — this means avoiding genres like Hard Rock, Grunge or Metal.

Save Metallica for the morning run and go for something groovy-soul-sexy such as Paula Cole’s, Feelin’ Love or Berlin’s classic, Take my Breath Away.

“Somewhere there’s a love in flames”.

(Check out this Soul Lovers playlist to give you some ideas.)

Savoring your Senses

Intense eye contact. Slow and deliberate touches. The taste of her body; her mouth and thighs. The sweet scent of her hair and musky wildflowers as she swells and opens up for you.

Making love is being present with your partner.

Take each moment seriously — it’s about connecting and finding yourself within the other; if you want to really find out how to make love to a woman, you’ll need to be serious about it and leave the jokes aside. At least, for the moment.

Believe me, she will be able to feel the difference in your emotional state during sex. Make sure she feels what you intend for her know in her heart and soul — what she means to you — which will translate into some unforgettable lovemaking.

A Slow and Beautiful Tease

“You get me closer to god”

– Lyrics from Closer by NIN

Granted, it’s not the ideal song for a love-making session, but there is something about those lyrics that ring true here — this is the place where you want to be and where you are headed; that place you can only experience with your senses, body and soul. The sweet realm you will never be able to quite remember but won’t ever forget.

It’s in your mindset and intention to surrender to pure love and soul dance.

You will get closer to “God” by slowly teasing her. Peu à peu. This is not a race to the end, my love. You’re not a stallion galloping to your stable. You are a magnificent lover who is in touch with himself and knows how to be with a woman’s body and soul.

Stroke her with the backs of fingers as you slowly undress her and follow with your lips. Use warm scented oil that is mouth friendly to draw out every moment.

Build the sexual tension until she begs for you take her; then, tease and tantalize your love-child some more.

Finding Intimate Positions

This isn’t looking down her back and gripping her hair during intercourse.

e.g. Doggy style is not a good position to go for when you are making love to a woman. It’s primal and detached, and exactly the opposite of what you want when lovemaking.

A huge part of how to make love to a woman involves face-to-face positions for the closet possible contact. You want intimate positions that allow for deep penetration, grinding instead of thrusting and great pacing.

Positions where you can start out easy and prolong the great tease with your … erm … very clean junk? Driving her wild so that she grinds against you like an insatiable pussycat pleading to feel more of you.

Divine. Love. Orgasmic. Heaven.

Becoming Attuned to Your Mate

At this point, you are so far into the tango-flame-game that you’re working it together in perfect synergy. You become distinctly aware of your partner’s responses — breathing, sighing, moans and body movements.

As Cohen so eloquently reminds us:

“Transcend the self-interested desire for sexual satisfaction so that your sexual partner’s self becomes yours, and conversely, making the goal of other-regarding sex moot.”

Enjoy your unique and beautiful love-language and keep talking to a minimum. You don’t want to break the sexy, intimate flow you’ve been working so hard to create.

And don’t forget to…

Hold her Afterwards

And speak of your love.

She is divine femininity; your Yin to your Yang; your precious woman who opens herself for you. If loved the right way, she’ll be your fire crucible — your eternal lover, safe place and world.

Home.

Treasure the moments; because each one experienced in that sacred place existing for sexy-soul lovers is an unrepeatable, magical gift.

The Art of Making Love to a Woman.


Soul Lovers Playlist

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Love and Connection, relationships, Soul

Have You Encountered a Significant Soul Connection?

Here’s a few telltale signs.


“We think we meet someone with our eyes. But we actually meet them with our soul”

― Mimi Novic

The reality of love is that it is difficult to articulate, define, measure, and rationalize. You might be able to feel it once it appears in your life, but you might not necessarily be able to put your feelings into words. Love is very subjective in the sense that the experience can vary from person to person, but the impact it has on our lives is astonishing nonetheless. Especially when meeting those profound souls destined to influence our life journey in a meaningful way. That special person who shows up in your life to blow love right out of the water — a significant soul connection.

A strong soul connection is what we often refer to as a soulmate. We have all encountered that person who feels incredibly familiar without any reason or cause; whose presence somehow induces change or ignites dormant feelings and hidden notions — like new ways of thinking and being in the world.

From Wikipedia:

“A soulmate is a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity. This may involve similarity, love, romance, platonic relationships, comfort, intimacy, sexuality, sexual activity, spirituality, compatibility and trust.”

But how do we really know what’s what in realm of souls and soulmates?

We can look toward others to give us a sense of direction — philosophers, quantum physics, ancient seers, light-workers and the like. People like Tanya Carroll Richardson from Mind, Body, Green Relationships who tells us that there are 12 types of soul connections and provides an in-depth look at their characteristics and how to recognize them:

“A soul connection is when two people feel they are linked on a soul level in a significant or extraordinary way.”

Tanya Carroll Richardson.

Years of insightful wisdom, research, spiritual teachings and truth-seeking from great minds culminate to help us better understand ourselves and the world. But the observations of others are a gift that can only take us so far — the rest we have to seek within to discover our own truths.

We have to do the inner-work to get there.


In his book, Life Between Lives, Dr Michael Newton breaks down soul clusters:

Primary Soul mates: Often this soul is a deeply bonded partner. This soul can be a spouse, but it could also be a brother, sister or best friend.

Companion Soul mates: These are the souls within a cluster group that make up our spiritual “family”. These souls are siblings, children and good friends when participating in our physical life.

Affiliated souls: These are all the souls that make up secondary groups located around our own primary cluster. They often incarnate as parents as well as protagonists to teach us certain lessons. They are, typically, acquaintances in life who are associated with us for a reason.


Significant Soul Connections

It isn’t unusual for us to experience a few great loves during our lifetime. Each relationship offers us unique lessons and different ways to expand our hearts. In fact, studies show that we are likely to fall in love three times during our lives, with the third love arriving unexpectedly to break all preconceived notions we had about our greatest love and what it would look like — a significant soul connection.

This third great love not only teaches us how to feel love but to also how to give love — it is the kind of love that keeps knocking on our door regardless of how long it takes us to answer.

LJ Herman delves deeper into our “three great loves” in the article: We Only Fall in Love with 3 People in Our Lifetime — Each One for a Specific Reason.

Our greatest love is the person who blazes into our lives in an extraordinary way to rattle us on a deep level. Their presence will always bring profound personal transformation.

Think of how a fire starts: the first stage begins when heat, oxygen and a fuel source combine and have a chemical reaction that results in fire. This is also known as ignition and can be likened to how a significant soul connection is experienced.

Here are some of the tell-tale signs that you have encountered a significant soul connection:

I Am Searching

This stage is not a desperate pursuit to hunt down a mate, nor is it necessarily a conscious search for “the one”. It is more like a part of you becomes involved in an acute awareness that something is missing or lacking in your life.

During the months prior to encountering a significant soul connection, you will sense them coming on a subconscious level and perhaps even experience a strong yearning for something unknown to you. You will probably doubt this feeling or be unsure of what to make of it at first, but deep inside you will find it impossible to shake the feeling that someone profound is about to enter your life.

Oxygen for Incipient Soul Lovers

From the first encounter you sense an unexplained familiarity about them. Their essence feels strong, laced with divinity and remarkably uncanny, but you will probably be fast to dismiss the feelings because it goes against everything logical that you have come to know about the world. You will tell yourself that you’re being unrealistic — you don’t even know this person.

Symptoms:

  • It is as if their presence has somehow breathed new air into your soul.
  • You will find yourself thinking about them for no reason at all and feel completely perplexed about doing so.
  • You will begin to “know” that their appearance in your life was no accident.
  • You will eventually acknowledge that someone and something significant has touched your life.
  • Your senses ignite.

Kundalini Heat

Kundalini is a Sanskrit word and has been used for thousands of years to describe life force energy or “prana”. Kundalini energy is the Divine Feminine Energy existing in us all — and it is the core of your personal power.

A significant soul connection will help to activate and awaken your Kundalini energy.

You begin to feel an intense magnetic pull toward them. No matter the circumstances, you feel extremely drawn to them and begin to sense when they become focused on you. Even if you don’t know much about them, you feel as if you have a responsibility towards this person.

Symptoms:

  • You experience a deep “inner-knowing” that this person is the most profound person you have encountered.
  • You begin to sense them in soul and experience their presence in a “higher dimension”.
  • Your energetic bodies start opening in the other’s presence and you merge into each other.
  • You will feel a significant shift take place within you as your heart chakra opens and mutual love is experienced.
  • You begin to sense the connection as a “higher purpose”; as if together you are meant to create something special to bring into the world.
  • Your entire being; mind, body, spirit and soul becomes encapsulated in “flames” as your Kundalini powerhouse energy is activated.
  • You can “see” them in soul.
  • You experience spiritual advancement which brings you closer to the divine and your spirituality.

Fuel Source and Chemical Reactions

The attraction you feel for a significant soul connection is like no other. This is something you have never before felt for anyone else and goes way beyond physical attraction. You are attracted to everything about them — their soul, personality, nuances and habits; and you will long to know more.

Symptoms:

  • Their energy is so familiar to you that you feel as if you’ve known them over a thousand lifetimes.
  • Nothing makes more sense to you in your life than this connection — even if it should make no sense at all.
  • Everything in your life before their appearance pales in comparison. Nothing feels more real; more authentic.
  • They are constantly on your mind and you can feel their presence, even when they are not physically with you.
  • Special communication: You receive many telepathic messages in the form of signs, thoughts, songs, which only the two of you will know. It will feel strange and magical.
  • You can somehow relate to them from a timeless, wordless dimension of pure being.
  • You begin to experience unusual signs and synchronicities from the universe.
  • You feel as if they are inside you or close to you even when you are far apart.
  • You sense a deep purity and sacredness in the connection.
  • Deep insecurities start rushing to the surface and you feel excruciatingly vulnerable and tearful.
  • You feel as if you can tell them anything.
  • A third energetic “God-filled” light-body emerges between the two of you.
  • You experience the deepest and purest love that you never knew was possible.
  • The connection transcends “I love you” and feels more like:

“Together, we are love”


The Significant Soul Connection that blows love right out of the water.


Originally published by Illumination on Medium.

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Love and Connection, relationships, Romance, sexuality, Soul, Women

The Healing Gifts of Deep Sexual Union

It’s time we began to figure it out.


When we think of a powerfully embodied human, certain characteristics immediately come to mind. To be powerfully embodied is to have a deep understanding of who you are and how your actions affect others. It’s the ability to manage your emotions and act from your authentic heart-center; it’s being able to overcome your fears enough to follow your dreams and live your deepest truths.

Powerfully embodied humans possess attributes like self-awareness, integrity, kindness and empathy; they do not walk through life hurting others.

A powerfully embodied human is in touch with their sexual power and emotional intimacy.

An individual who possesses the above-mentioned qualities is also someone who is deeply actualized and expressed in their sexuality. In reality, it is uncommon to encounter such a person. Perhaps this is because taboo, narrow-mindedness and warped sexual hang-ups have managed to drench the purity and power of human sexuality and connectedness.

The true meaning of sexual empowerment has been lost on most of us beneath a tsunami of misconceptions, suppression and misuse.

None so much as the ultimate gift to man; the healing qualities of the sexually realized feminine — Woman.

We are keen get to the page to share our viewpoints about our experiences; lessons learned and the key take-aways. We’re offering ways on how to live a better life; maintain healthier relationships; balance our mental health and make positive change. The key to unlocking personal empowerment and well-being can be discovered in a matter of clicks. Yet, rarely do we acknowledge the one and most important element to actually achieving true inner-connectedness — to each other, and to spirit and prosperity — the art of sacred sexuality.

“Sexuality is a superpower. The healing of sexuality is perhaps the most revolutionary step in the present healing work after thousands of years of suppression and neglect.”

Dieter Duhm

Sexuality has a spiritual reality which plays a huge part in conscious connection, awakening and self-awareness. The link between sexuality and spirituality is strong and acts as a sacred bridge between our physicality and our soul. It is through sex that we discover and connect to the whole of the universe.

Through the ages, mystics have known and taught that sexuality is the outer physical manifestation of a spiritual urge to have mystical union with the eternal spirit. Tantric Yoga teaches that our natural desire and urge for sexual expression can become a means to union with source energy or God and is “at its highest level of human expression”.

It is crazy-mad how much intellect and energy we use to suppress, hide and redirect our sexual energy. Equally interesting is that sexuality has been deduced to just a strong biological urge or the simple purpose to procreate. Time has tarnished the authentic sexual union to a gratifying, often voyeuristic or casual encounter. We have actually learned to feel shame about our natural desires, passion and longing.

The result has found us existing in an age where our desire for sexual connection has been downgraded to lower forms of sexual expression.

But none of this can diminish the spiritual significance or the real spiritual truth underlying the relationship between sexuality and spirituality. No amount of unawareness can actually omit the fact that sexuality itself is a sacred life force and the conceiving power in the universe — no matter how far suppressing female sexuality was the main tool of domination during the patriarchal era.

Carl Jung believed there was more to the libido than what psychologists had attributed solely to the sexual drive when he declared: “In truth, the libido is a life force or urge to life itself.”

In its simplest terms, life force energy is the intelligent powerful energy from God or source energy to creation. It connects us to everything in existence and without it, there is no existence. Many cultures from ancient civilizations up until modern day science have been aware of an energy surrounding living organisms.

We know that this higher-intelligent energy exists.


The Healing Gifts of the Sacred Feminine.

“Woman has so much to bring to this planet once she is loved upon and supported. She is here as a powerful service to love and life. But we have spent history mishandling her. Raping and pillaging her resources, controlling her; assuming that she is limited. She is not limited. Woman is entirely unlimited when she is of aliveness. Powerful sex is a method of stoking the fires of life within. It keeps us alight.”

“Master Energy Worker, Sexual Alchemist and Spiritual Guide.”

Chris Bale

A woman who is well-sexed is like the most lustrous star in a night sky. She is a creative force who thrives and glows to her natural rhythm; she is alive and obvious, and she carries a certain type of magic that unfurls, transforms and embellishes everything she touches.

A well-sexed woman soars above all, but she is almost elusive.

Bale, who has had many years of experience assisting countless women with energetic initiation says: “There are cornerstones of a man’s development; sexual understanding and implementation is a huge part of the greater whole. Really learning how to be with a woman’s body and soul is a true art form which requires deep listening and a commitment to presence.

Learning to be and to stay present with her is where our healing exists … do not underestimate the necessity of figuring this out. It will grant you a very different experience in this life.”

Chris Bale is a man who has come to realize the sacred power and healing in the feminine. A rarity among men who understands that a woman who is deeply in touch with her feminine sexual power is a like blazing flume — a love-channel of life, spirit and pure healing energy that allows, in full freedom and trust, to energetically express our joy in life and find healing in the sacred union.

Being loved upon is like soul syrup to the feminine. Deep sex with a conscious and present man is like medicine.

Consider the following script from Tamera — Sexuality as Sacred Power:

“Before patriarchal religions introduced the concept of sex as “sinful,” which they used to dominate people, ancient tribes saw Eros as a natural path to connecting with the sacred. Ancient feminine mystery knowledge placed women at the center of the tribe, where they could connect to nature and the goddess and practice fertility and sexuality rituals. To people living in harmony with the natural rhythms of the Earth’s cycles and all life around them, sex was part of the sacred practice of transformation.”

Deep sex is embodied with deep nourishment.

A transformative healing takes place when a woman is well-sexed by her “present” man. This is because deep penetration and intense connectedness supports and guides a woman back to her core. It creates contemporary pathways toward the heart and body. It unleashes her from stress and anxiety and keeps her connected with her vibrating orgasmic consciousness and spirit — all of which she needs to remain in health.

Bale goes on to state that: “You are dealing with a beautifully wild and insatiable love monster, who’s staple is conscious-cock with heart.”

This is done through a man’s capacity for presence; through deliberate and present sexual union.

Essentially, we are talking about two people coming together in absolute fusion to make high forms of love and intentionally tap into the healing power available in the spirit of true sexuality; lovers creating the space that allows us to trust, connect and touch upon the euphoric pleasures and essence of the universal reality of sexuality.

There lies the path and power of true healing for humanity; and there exists in all its wonderful glory the key to true self-realization and empowerment.

I cannot help but agree with Bale when he mentions that “every woman wants to feel her man’s reverence and honor between her thighs — She wants her heart to be f**ked wide open via his love; his conscious-cock and his firm connection with heart.”

“She wants to feel your Godliness, and she longs to drip down upon it, feeding your deepest essence with her nectar.”

Imagine a world when we begin to actually figure it out?

Start figuring it out. Please.


Originally published by Illumination on Medium

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Love and Connection, relationships, Romance, sexuality, Soul, Women

What Makes a Man an Unforgettable Lover?


There are those among us who think of sex as nothing more than a means to an end. It often starts out this way, during those tempestuous teen years when our raging hormones demand that we explore the alluring world of sex. Sex is a built-in motive we lust after to satisfy our ardent curiosity as well as our growing physiological needs.

We have all been there.

The first guy I had sex with had an insatiable sex drive. He was more experienced than me but once we started, it was on for young and old – anywhere, anytime. It didn’t matter where we were or who was around, there was a time when his hand almost became a permanent addition in my panties.

Hmm … maybe that’s where my love of fingers originated. He did have skill in the finger department, but that’s about where it ended.

Our relationship lasted for 5 years before we called it quits. He thought that he’d be able to come back and marry me some future day when he was ready. I thought otherwise, and it had nothing to do with the fact that although we had been highly active in the bedroom, he wasn’t a great lover.

Why?

It’s like the million-dollar question for women everywhere. We can never quite tell for sure if a man is going to be great in the sack until we’re actually rolling in it with him. I mean, every man knows the basics – give her a smooch; fondle her here; rub there; part her thighs and hammer in. But that’s just sex.  

Any guy can sex it up but that doesn’t make him an unforgettable lover.

Personally, I feel as if the tell-tale signs of a man’s sexual prowess may be prevalent through his developed tastes, level of creativity and small nuances outside of the bedroom.

Men who have a creative side and practice extracurricular activities are usually more broad-minded, soulful and more in tune with their senses and with life. As are those men who are spontaneous and adventurous – who are not uptight or feel the need to schedule every minute of every day. Guys with these types of characteristics tend to show up in the bedroom and make for better lovers.

My ex-boyfriend was all about the visual senses and fast-action and less about exploring and developing sensual pleasures and savouring my body. His arousal was defined by handling me as if I was his sex-toy – here to serve and please his desires with little regard for my own. He enjoyed my body, but only to the extent his primitive style of passion allowed. In other words, he was never interested in refining his skills as a lover – and no, he didn’t possess a creative flair or a deep passion to experience life in new ways.

He was rather humdrum.  

Not every man or woman is actually interested in taking the time to learn how to be a great lover, opting instead to remain a lousy lay and/or continue to see sex as a means to an end – orgasmic release or an act carried out for the purpose of pro-creation.

Both viewpoints are kind of dull if you ask me. Imagine if we only had sex to procreate?

Frustration. Overload.  

We are sexually driven creatures by nature and the fact is that sex is one of the greatest aspects of our humanity. Anyone who has experienced orgasmic heaven and real connection with an attentive lover can attest to that. Sex is pleasurable and fun; it helps to relieve stress and strengthens our relationships and connections – it is the ultimate expression of love.

Speaking of expressions of love, here’s a few ultimate traits that I consider vital in making a man an unforgettable lover:

Lips Like Seduction

Kissing can be totally amazing or … erm … worthy of a good cringe followed by a fast excuse to bail out.

The way a man kisses a woman is a huge indication of his underlying passion to connect deeply – and deep connection is what makes an unforgettable lover.

But please don’t throw in the towel too early. We all know that first kiss can be a little nerve-wracking and less-than-perfect what with the pressure and all – but if it begins to heat up and gets you all bothered, then pay attention, girl – you may have a Casanova on your hands!

An unforgettable lover knows how to use his lips like a seductive artform to induce a rush of deep arousal in his woman; and he enjoys every moment of building the sexual tension through his kiss.

Passion Like Fever

Love is the most important element in a relationship and passion is the fire that helps to create total fusion. There must exist an intense sexual desire for your partner and a deep need to express strong emotion through love-making to reach the next level in intimacy.

Sometimes, the only way to channel and express our emotions in totality is through the act of sex. Like an outlet for our deepest and most sacred parts. We cannot always fully articulate the depth of our feelings to the person we love – so, when words are not enough, we use our bodies; bonding through our passion can convey infinitely beautiful feelings.  

An unforgettable lover possesses and expresses his feelings in his lover’s touch – he isn’t afraid to show his love for his woman through acts of unbridled passion.       

Attentiveness Like Arousal

The most unforgettable lovers are the ones who are in tune with their woman and are attentive to her needs and desires in the bedroom.

Forget the 5-minute wham-bam. There will be no thank you, ma’am’s from this side of the table. A man who is an unforgettable lover knows the importance of pacing; he’s the real chill-deal who relishes sweet sensations and sensual caresses, and he will take his cues from his woman – her pleasure is his greatest turn-on.

Psychology Today: “One of women’s main sexual complaints about their lovers is that men rush into intercourse before women feel ready for genital play.”

I can’t tell you how many times my lady friends have expressed the very same thing – slow down and then get a little slower.

An unforgettable lover considers his lover’s entire body his erotic playground and savours every inch – he knows how to prime her for the main event.

But not before…  

Tongue Like Erotica

It would be impossible to not add the fine and delicate art of cunnilingus to a list of traits constituting an unforgettable lover. He must honor the pussy who he seeks to take and if he can’t or won’t give her the gift of his passionate kiss in her most intimate parts, then all cards are off the table.

More than just eating pussy; it’s a constitution that requires developed skill and intentional attention to tap into and connect with his woman’s essence via his lips and tongue.

An unforgettable lover has a strong desire to know his woman’s body and learn what turns her on. He wants to taste her sex – he knows that her scent is all his and he’ll push her to the edge of desire – allowing her to linger in the throes of erotica, lust and love as he ignites her inner-Sex Goddess.


An unforgettable lover is a man who has passion, patience and a deep sense of appreciation for love, connection and all of life. He is open to experiencing moments of vulnerability and probably has a delightful kinky side, too, but most importantly, he sees sex for what it really is – a gift. A beautiful, beautiful gift.  


Originally published by Sexography on Medium.

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Soul, Whispers

Awakening the Heart Can Do Anything

But it takes a whole lot of courage to get there.

A rustic wooden heart dangles on a solitary, wrought iron candelabra that my son crafted during a metal workshop lesson some years ago. It’s rough and wore-torn, and it leans slightly to one side but I love it. It stands atop a chest of file-drawers beneath the window in my office; a keepsake from his early teenage years.

I used to live in the Blue Mountains — a rugged stretch of dramatic ranges west of Sydney. It’s one of those places that seeps into your bones and forever ensnares a part of your soul. Much like the moments before dawn when the sun emerges from the sea to leave you standing in a place of awe.

Nature has a way of stripping you bare when you allow its essence to bleed into you. Connecting and grounding to our natural world is important in maintaining inner-balance and peace. They are some of the most precious moments existing throughout our lifetimes; created to nourish your soul and remind us of our humanity, as well as the eternal spirit within.

Have you ever gazed at the stars and completely surrendered yourself to their cryptic twinkles, or stood at a cliff top and succumbed to the glorious scene spreading before you?

It’s deeply humbling and empowering at the same time.

You can literally feel yourself merge with the earth’s spirit which sparks an undeniable connection to something far greater than yourself. It is through contemplating your bond with the universal spirit that will unlock the path to self-awareness and higher states of love.

God frolics among the forest treetops, snow-capped mountains and rugged coastlines. God waits for you to recognize yourself in each moment gifted to you, and every glance you didn’t really see.

I’m not religious. At all. I don’t adhere to any religious deity, and I do not use the word God in the context as such. To me, God is not a supernatural force who judges our earthly indiscretions, but a term to describe source energy — the higher intelligence governing creation and all that is. The source of unconditional love.

Let’s leave the judgement for the lower vibrational beings in our world. Those who are tethered to a set of rules and systems bred from fear and designed to control the masses. Unfortunately, it’s difficult to escape the reality concocted by fear.

Blinders.

We are born shrouded by invisible blinders that conceal the truth of the divine resources available to us. Limitation is everywhere and shown to us at the onset. It’s no wonder that we become so confused and frazzled as we move through life; that our mental health suffers beneath layers of pressure, stress and delusion.

Delusion for inauthenticity, and for the perceived limitations that we allow to determine the choices made from a closed mindset. Choices made from fear — the opposite of the unconditional love we should be aspiring toward.

Often, it is our most hearts desires that are left on the altar of authenticity. We learn to sacrifice deep love or passion because we believe that to follow our truths is too hard, selfish, or unattainable. We think we’re not good enough, smart enough or talented enough.

We believe in those blinders.

The best hippie store ever is in those mountains west of Sydney. The owner travels the world to scour exotic foreign markets in India, South East Asia and South America to gather the most exquisite, rare and usual pieces and trinkets for his store. Which actually resembles some place you might find in an obscure market alleyway in Turkey. At least, that’s what I envision.

His store was one of my most favorite places to visit when I lived in the mountains. That’s where I picked up that old timber heart piece over a decade ago. The bold message etched across its face spoke to me:

Love. The heart can do anything.

It may sound a bit mushy for those who dismiss romantic notions, but opening the heart isn’t just about romantic love. It is about choosing to live from your heart energy through practicing opening, clearing, cleansing, supporting and strengthening the heart space. 

Consider this quote from Rumi:

“A thousand half-loves must be forsaken to take one whole heart home.”

One whole heart home. Some of us are ready to forsake half-loves to take one whole heart home, but what does that mean?

It means courage.

Often, we forget to just sit with the feeling of love and allow its intense hues to fill us up until it overflows from our being. Life throws us so many challenges. We all tend to have a knack for switching off our hearts when it is convenient or when it seems too hard. The blinders close in all around us until we think there isn’t enough love inside of us to go around or turn the impossible, possible.

Closing your heart means stagnation.

It means rejecting your life-force energy, which will serve to wither your soul and narrow the scope of your world. It means settling for discontentment, getting used to feeling unfulfilled and being afraid because it is through our hearts that connects us with others and allows us to feel compassion, empathy, courage and love.

Moreover, it through our hearts that opens the channel toward realizing our connection to our sacredness — the key to transformation, joy and happiness.

Courage is vital to realizing out most fulfilling life. 

It is true that the greatest forms of love we may encounter will be our most difficult to perceive and express — the precious whole hearted love you want to take home and keep forever. 

These forms of rare love arrive to push us into greater states of awareness as they test our inner-strength and faith as our hearts reopen to love to a greater degree.

This is how the heart transforms us — through daring us to accept deeper spheres of love and contemplate new ways of thinking and being. A higher love that propels us into deep reflection, causing a significant a shift within.

It is the cycle of rebirthing your spirit.

The courageous heart is driven toward questioning the blinders to ponder higher-level concepts that will shatter preconceived notions and expectations surrounding love and limitation. 

It is through a brave heart that will move you toward fulfilling your passions, emerging into your truths and facing the challenges as you go deeper and quest longer in the name of love, ease and expansion.

Transformation is a choice.

It starts with you. Allow the energy and wisdom of your heart guide you toward transformation and living a self-focused life paved with moments of creating greater awareness.

It is through love that you will expand your mind to see past the blinders and create new realities in the world. It is through contemplating your connection to the earth and universal spirit that will act as a springboard toward awakening your heart and accepting great love in your life; and ultimately each heart transformation affects us all. 

It is time to trust in yourself that you may feel love, have compassion and find the courage to embrace all of life’s sweetest offerings. 

It is time to awaken your heart.


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